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The Great Peace-Makers

The word ”peace” has many meanings. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, it can mean, among other things, “a state or period of mutual concord between governments”, “a pact or agreement to end hostilities between those who have been at war or in a state of enmity”, “freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions” or “a state of tranquility or quiet in a place”.

Regardless of which meaning is given to it, the preservation of peace makes it possible to maintain a well-functioning community, pave the way for prosperity and bring hope to people.

Nobel Peace Prize

It is no wonder that many people from all eras have fought for world peace and made it their life mission. To honour their contribution to humanity, the Nobel Peace Prize was established in 1901 and has been awarded almost every year, except in 1917, 1944 and 1945, when there were world wars and no single, unanimous candidate.

Martin Luther King Jr. is surely one of the most famous recipients of this award, which was presented to him in 1964 for his non-violent advocacy for civil rights, particularly with regard to racial segregation.

Mother Teresa, another well-known figure, was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1979 for her charitable work with the poor and for educating street children in Calcutta, India. As for Nelson Mandela, he was awarded the prize in 1993 for his work to end the apartheid regime and lay the foundations for democracy in South Africa.

More recently, in 2009, former U.S. President Barack Obama received this honour for his efforts in strengthening international diplomacy, while this prize was bestowed upon Malala Yousafzai for her fight against the repression of children and their right to education.

The symbols of peace

One of the most famous peace signs is probably the circle with a horizontal bar and an upside-down V-shape. It was originally created in 1958 by opponents of nuclear weapons, with the two arms corresponding to the letter N in the British semaphore code and the central bar to a D, for “nuclear disarmament”. The symbol was quickly adopted by the international community to embody peace, notably by the “peace and love” movement.

The white flag, which is particularly seen in cartoons featuring pirates, has been used as a symbol of peace or a request for peace talks for many years. Its use was confirmed in 1899 in the annex to the Hague Convention on the Laws and Customs of War, but its use is documented as early as 1625 in Grotius’ On The Law of War and Peace.

The dove holding an olive branch in its beak also embodies peace, and has done so since as far back as antiquity, since this symbolism is found in Greek mythology and the Bible. A dove or an olive branch is often found on urns and funeral monuments to indicate that we want the deceased to rest in peace.

As we can see, peace is of great importance in our lives and well-being. It is never taken for granted and should be cherished as a precious gift.

Health: The Effects of Heat Waves on the Human Body

Summer in Quebec brings its share of very hot weather and heat waves. As the years go by, our summers are becoming hotter and more humid, often causing problems for the population. The impact of such heat affects everyone, but especially the elderly, infants and children, people taking medication, the vulnerable, or those who work or exercise outdoors during heat waves. Find out how heat affects your body and how to protect yourself.

The human body

We call it a “heat wave” when the temperature and humidity levels exceed the seasonal norm for several days. Normal body temperature is 37° C or 98.6° F, so on days when it is over 25° degrees C, our bodies overheat. However, rest assured, the human body is well made, so our body’s mechanism for fighting heat is activated: blood flow increases and the body perspires. And sweating makes it possible for the heat to be released through evaporation and through the water evacuated from the body.

However, too much heat will affect the body’s ability to regulate its temperature, which can lead to certain minor or major problems: dehydration, exhaustion, sunstroke, heatstroke, serious illness or even death.

Heat stroke

Here are the symptoms to look for if you suspect heat stroke or sunstroke. Heat stroke is more serious and requires medical attention. When the symptoms are less severe, it is called sunstroke. In the case of one or more minor symptoms, take shelter in a cool, ventilated area, stay well hydrated and rest. You can even spray yourself with water to cool down.

Headaches
Staggering when you walk
Intense thirst
Fatigue
Nausea or vomiting
Deterioration of intellectual and physical abilities
Fever over 40° C
Accelerated pulse and breathing
Drop in blood pressure
Coma

Dehydration

Did you know that with age, the body sweats less and less? This is why older people are more likely to become dehydrated, because they don’t feel as thirsty as younger people do. Infants are also at risk, because they can’t express it. In addition, taking certain medications can also increase water loss or make dehydration worse. Similarly, excessive mineral loss can cause exhaustion.

It is then necessary to compensate for the loss of water and mineral salts with “home-made” rehydration solutions or those available at the pharmacy. If your urine is dark or you haven’t urinated in several hours, this is also a sign that you are low on water.

How can you protect yourself from the adverse effects of heat or dehydration?

Drink water regularly.
Avoid sugary drinks, coffee and alcohol.
Eat enough and properly.
Wear a hat or cap.
Wet your body several times a day (pool, body of water, shower, etc.).
Maintain a cool temperature in your home and ventilate as much as possible.
Plan your outings and trips to avoid the hottest times of the day (around noon and early afternoon).
If you don’t have access to air conditioning, take advantage of it by going out and doing your shopping, going to the movies or to the library in your neighbourhood. In short, visit places that have air conditioning.
Avoid strenuous exercise during the hottest times of the day.
Wet your clothes or your head covering to keep cool.

If you think you are suffering from the heat and notice worrisome symptoms, call Info-Santé at 811 or contact your pharmacist or doctor.

The Family: Definition and Values

Big or small, nuclear (traditional), single-parent or blended, family is much more than a set of individuals living under the same roof. We can call it a natural social system with its own set of rules, characteristics and properties and a prescribed role for each of its members. The members of a family support one another in good times and bad, which is why it is important to take care of one another, regardless of each one’s stage of life.

Traditionally, we call “family” the related people living under the same roof, especially: father, mother and children. Some families are stimulating, warm and united, while others are colder and more boring; it all depends on these members and the climate that is established and prioritized. The term “family” is most commonly used to describe a blood relationship or a marriage, but for many years now, it has also been used to describe a group of individuals who have a strong bond of belonging to other members of a group. Understanding, communication, trust and love are all part of a family’s upbringing.

“Friends are a family whose members have been chosen.” – Alphonse Karr

The 5 human values of the family

In order to facilitate relationships and to respect the hierarchy or the role of each person within the household or group, five fundamental values are part of raising young and not so young people, making it possible to stick together, through thick and thin:

Love: This is expressed through affectionate gestures between family members, shared warmth and good communication.
Obedience: This means setting guidelines and limits. Obedience is primarily respect for the authority of the household and the rules. It is easier to develop good habits by example.
Tolerance: This means accepting who we are and what others are, understanding the others with their strengths and weaknesses. This value is very important among people who live together.
Respect: This involves avoiding hurting others. It is put into practice with tolerance, as we all have a limit that must not be overstepped by others. Respect is often explained by the old saying: ‘We don’t do to others what we wouldn’t like them to do to us!”
Responsibility: This means being responsible to the rest of the family, looking after the others and following the concept of giving without necessarily expecting something in return.

Of course, these 5 core values are not the only ones. Honesty, empathy, forgiveness, self-sufficiency and belonging are all values that are important to instill in the family and especially in young children. Being part of a group or a whole that is bigger than oneself brings positivity and emotional well-being, just as humans are always more likely to connect with other individuals who share their values and their views. Humans are social beings and the family, whether biological or not, is their clan, always ready to support each other, regardless of the situation.

In short, when it comes to the death of a family member, it is the survivors who must look after making the arrangements and grieve together. It is often at this time that the family becomes close-knit or is torn apart. At Crématorium Montréal, we are used to helping families—even the most complex ones—with their funeral arrangements. We are here to help you. Contact us!

8 Signs to Watch for When a Loved One is Dying

No one is really prepared for the death of a loved one, even when that person is ill. Disillusionment or hope? The human brain has a hard time adjusting to such a situation and the process has to be started over again each time. However, it is important to know the signs of death in order to prepare oneself mentally and physically. Crématorium Montreal sheds light on the signs to watch for when someone close to you is ill or at the end of life.

The downward slope

As death approaches, bodily and cognitive functions begin to slow down and sometimes become muddled. A number of changes can be observed, such as: deterioration in physical condition, psychological changes, loss of appetite and hydration, decrease in weight or body mass and change in breathing, to name a few.

The three phases

The last months of life can be broken down into 3 distinct phases:

The pre-terminal phase – usually 1-3 months before death
The terminal phase – usually 1-3 weeks before death
Agony – a few days or hours before death.

Sometimes one of the phases can happen very quickly or even be skipped altogether and move on to the next. Each person is different and the process can be different as well, depending on the illness and its severity.

The 8 signs to look for in order to gradually prepare yourself

Withdrawal: The person may be more distant or indifferent to everything around them. He or she may be less interested in socializing with others, lose interest in favourite activities, and sometimes become agitated or irritable.

Drowsiness: As death approaches, the person may become more drowsy or sleepy and may be more difficult to wake up. He or she may even fall asleep while talking or show generalized signs of weakness.

Reduced food and drink intake: When the body slows down, the need for fluids and food decreases, making the person less hungry or thirsty. He or she may also have difficulty swallowing, so should not be forced to eat and drink as before.

Breathing changes: Breathing may decrease or speed up and be shallow. The person may also stop breathing momentarily for several seconds. Irregular breathing is a sign not to be ignored.

Loss of bladder or bowel control: Generalized weakness sometimes causes the pelvic muscles to relax, resulting in incontinence.

Skin changes: As death approaches, the skin may look paler, mottled or bluish, thinner and drier—a sign of fragility. Redness may also appear in the joints and the skin may feel colder.

Delirium: The person may not recognize loved ones, be confused about the day, the date or even the time. He or she may also experience hallucinations, which sometimes creates agitation or anxiety.

Temporary improvement: The last sign creates false hopes—the person’s condition often improves briefly before death. Also called a “moment of lucidity”, this allows the person to interact with loved ones and be more alert to his or her surroundings before the condition deteriorates again. This is often a time for good-byes.

In short, it’s perfectly normal to feel sad when dying loved ones become detached from us or when we see them deteriorate. But don’t take their reactions or behaviours personally. Cherish every moment spent with your dying loved ones in their final moments, providing solace, physical comfort, support and love. Remember, too, that hearing is the last sense to go, allowing ill or dying loved ones to hear you speak to them and reassure them.

All about Columbariums

A columbarium is a place of eternal rest, a cinerary monument, that is to say, it is designed to hold the ashes of a deceased person. Often erected in collective form, columbariums have several compartments where the urns of deceased people can be kept together. Like a cemetery plot, a columbarium space can hold one, two or more urns from the same family, if space permits. Crématorium Montréal takes the mystery out of columbariums for you!

Originating in ancient Greece

In ancient Greece, death without a grave was unthinkable. The purpose of funeral rites and ceremonies was to prevent the souls of the deceased from wandering restlessly and tormenting their families. While the poorest were often thrown into mass graves, cremation was a ritual reserved for the richest. It was even possible to perceive the wealth of individuals by the quality of the ashes, where even the bones were reduced to a fine white dust. The urns were then placed in a columbarium for eternal rest.

Columbariums were also an option of choice for the citizens of ancient Rome. They were built partly or entirely underground, on public land along the Roman roads, in order to keep the cities “pure”. The columbariums, sanctified by the priests, were an inexpensive way to ensure the transition between life and death, because at that time, cremation was the most common funeral practice. The nobility sometimes granted the privilege of this ritual to some of their most esteemed slaves. With the arrival of Christianity in the 11th century, burial was gradually imposed, thereby reducing the use of columbariums for several centuries.

Among the most famous columbariums, we find : Pomponius Hylas, Tiberius Claudius Vitalis and that of Vigna Codini, all located in Rome.

The columbariums of today

Today, columbariums allow for above-ground burials, which can be in an outdoor garden or even indoors, in a temperature-controlled atmosphere. They can be part of a cemetery or a stand-alone building. Derived from Latin, the word columba means “pigeon house”, which explains the specific architecture of these buildings. The niches have secure facades—either transparent, to allow the urn and the deposited memories to be seen, or made of granite or bronze with an engraved plaque in the same way as a regular monument. A contract, valid for a determined period of time (often between 25 and 100 years), formalizes the purchase of the space including the maintenance of the columbarium. Prices may vary from one space to another, depending on the length of the concession, the layout and maintenance, and the appearance, size, accessibility and location of the niche.

In short, columbariums may be private or public and of various sizes. They have a fixed number of hours when they are accessible. True places of peace and serenity, columbariums allow you to visit your dearly departed in a pleasant environment, conducive to meditation. Ask our Crématorium Montréal advisors for more information about our facilities, our columbariums and the options available to you or your loved one.

Offering Condolences: to Whom, How, Why?

Offering condolences to a bereaved person is a delicate gesture. Whether or not we share their grief, we still feel the need to say or do something to soothe them or to be polite. There are various ways to express our support to a grieving person without making mistakes, but there is no substitute for a kind word expressed from the heart. If you prefer classic condolence messages, Crematorium Montréal will guide you through the alternatives.

The traditional and personal tone

The tone of a condolence message varies depending on the type of relationship you have with the bereaved or the deceased. Generally speaking, the closer one is to the deceased, the more personal the message will be, as we will be speaking from our heart and in our own words. However, if the bereaved is not a close relative, it is preferable to keep it simple and use more traditional phrases such as: “I’m sorry for your loss” and its variations:

My deepest condolences.
I am with you in your grief.
I am thinking of you.
I share your grief.
I share your sorrow.
I share your sadness.
With my deepest sympathy.
With all my sympathy.
With our warm thoughts and prayers.
You are in our thoughts.
I share your pain and offer our sincere condolences to you and your family.

You can also use phrases that are not so short, such as:

It is with the deepest sadness that I have just learned of the loss that you are facing.
I can well imagine your grief and sorrow. I am thinking of you very much.
I am heartbroken by this sudden loss and I share your grief.
Rest assured that I am by your side and supporting you in this ordeal.

A little expression of support and care will bring comfort and will be appreciated. When you are close to the bereaved person, your message of condolence can include a more concrete offer of support and help, such as, “If I can be of any support or help to you in any way, don’t hesitate to let me know; I’m here for you!” Or you can share fond memories or say how much you miss the person who died.

Here are some phrases with a personal touch that you can use if you are at a loss for words:

I’m thinking of you.
I’m so very sorry for your loss.
He/she was a wonderful person.
I will miss him/her terribly.
I’m here for you.
I love you (if you are very close to the bereaved person).

Phrases to avoid

What is important when it comes to expressing condolences is to avoid clumsiness. Above all, don’t deny that the deceased has died or that the grieving person is suffering emotionally. The loss of a loved one is a big hurdle to go through. Also, avoid empty phrases like:

He/she is better off where he/she is.
I know how you feel.
How are you doing? How are you holding up?
I don’t know what I would do if (my own mother) died! (to someone who has lost his/her mother)
At least he/she didn’t suffer.
At least you had a chance to say goodbye to him/her.
Things will be better soon.
I offer you my sympathies.

In short, no matter how you go about offering your condolences, make sure you speak with kindness and respect and from your heart. You can also show your support with flowers, little plates of prepared food or simply by being discreet and present for the bereaved person.

What to Do with the Ashes After Cremation

What to do with the ashes of a loved one following the cremation of the deceased’s body? This is one of the most common questions asked of funeral homes and one of the most frequently asked questions on the web. Crématorium Montreal offers you a few options as well as information on what you need to know before choosing the final resting place for your loved one.

The decision of the deceased comes first

Before you even consider the options available to you, it is important to note that the deceased may have already chosen what to do with his/her ashes in his/her Last Will and Testament. If this information is not included in that document, it will then be up to the family to make the decision.

The choice of urn

Regardless of the choice made by the deceased or the family, the ashes must be placed in an urn in order to leave the funeral home with which you have dealt. Wood, metal, stone, ceramic, glass, resin, salt, sand, paper or recycled cardboard—there are many different materials and designs to meet your needs or to honour the memory of the deceased. They are also available in all shapes and sizes. The type of urn will depend on what you choose to do with the ashes.

What do we do with them next?

There are many ways to dispose of the ashes of a departed loved one, depending on one’s values and beliefs. You can:

Keep the ashes at home
Sometimes, the family just wants to keep the urn at home in a simple way. In this case, the urn is placed in a special location for contemplation or merely in plain sight with a photo. It is also possible to use the ashes to make decorative objects such as reliquaries. At Crématorium Montréal, we offer a wide variety of reliquaries at our online shop.

Burial of ashes in a cemetery
A more traditional option is to bury the urn in a family plot or to purchase a plot in a cemetery. In this way, the family can pay their respects in front of a monument, in the same way as a traditional burial. It is important to know that it is against the law to bury an urn anywhere other than in a cemetery.

Display the urn in a columbarium
The columbarium is a peaceful, serene place where urns can be stored or displayed in glass cases. Much like a cemetery, the columbarium is an indoor or outdoor place of remembrance that family members can visit to pay their respects to their deceased loved one.

Scatter the ashes in nature
In Quebec, it is permitted to scatter the ashes of a deceased person in nature, as long as they do not constitute a nuisance and the scattering is not done in a way that could compromise the dignity of the deceased. There is no need to let the ashes blow away in the wind; you may dispose of the ashes of the deceased in an ecological way, thanks to biodegradable urns made of salt, sand, paper, etc., if it has environmental properties.

In short, for any questions or to help you choose the best option according to your needs, customs, values and traditions, or those of a loved one, consult the advisors at Crématorium Montréal. Our dedicated team is used to dealing with these types of questions and will be able to guide you.

What to Do with the Property of a Deceased Person

The death of a loved one is a difficult experience to go through. The deceased person’s family and friends often find themselves involuntarily managing the many steps relating to the departure of their loved one, in addition to having to deal with their grief. Crématorium Montréal explains what to do with the deceased’s belongings, to help you navigate this rather unfamiliar situation.

The estate

In legal jargon, all the property owned by a person at the time of death is called the “estate”. The estate can be accepted or refused, and the heirs generally have six months to make their decision. The property in the estate must then be “liquidated” in accordance with the wishes of the deceased, or in accordance with the law, if the will doesn’t mention it. Usually, the name of the designated liquidator of the estate is included in the will. This person is responsible for ensuring the proper management of the deceased’s belongings to be liquidated in the heirs’ interest.

The inventory

In order to know the extent of the estate, it is essential to make an inventory, as required by law. This inventory will provide a realistic picture of the deceased’s assets and debts. The inventory includes immovable property (the official designation of properties with their respective values), cars, collections of various objects, antique furniture, etc. It also includes bank accounts, stocks, bonds, debts and other similar securities with the value of each one. In addition, it is important to list assets and liabilities and to publish a Notice of closure of the inventory in the Registre des droits personnels et réels mobiliers (RDPRM) (the register of personal and movable real rights), once everything is established.

To help you, it is recommended that you call on the services of specialists to assess the value of the belongings (assets). Take note that without an inventory, the heirs are responsible for the deceased’s debts.

What to do with personal household belongings

Often indicated in the will or discussed with the family beforehand, personal belongings of sentimental value are often divided among the heirs, according to the wishes of the deceased. Since items worth less than $100 are not included in the inventory, it is up to the family to keep or dispose of them. Souvenirs, framed photos, photo albums, jewelry, clothing, stationery, furniture, dishes, etc. are all items that may have great sentimental value, so it is important to respect the wishes of the deceased.

If no mention is made and you find yourself with a lot of possessions to dispose of, consider helping others by donating them to non-profit organizations. They will then give items such as clothing or small appliances to people or families in need. Here is a complete list of organizations that collect donations by type of item in the Greater Montreal area:

Otherwise, the Fondation la collecte, Le Support or Entraide diabétique du Québec, to name a few, are all organizations that collect your items in good condition to fund important causes in Quebec! Another great way to give back to the community…

In short, it is true that the departure of a loved one brings great upheaval, pain and a considerable amount of work to understand all the steps and liquidate the estate. For more details on what to do after the death of a loved one, contact a Crématorium Montréal advisor, who will be able to direct you to the right resources to help you get through this ordeal more serenely.

Candles: Meaning and Influence

For a number of people, candles are endowed with many powers. Used for rituals, for prayers, to make wishes or to honour a loved one, the candle was invented in the middle of the 19th century, when it was used mainly as a source of light. According to various beliefs, the coloured candles we know today have specific meanings and uses. Crematorium Montreal invites you into the world of coloured candles.

From tallow candles to modern-day candles

The ancestor of modern-day candles, tallow candles were invented 3,000 years before Christ. Originally, they were made of rushes soaked in animal (beef or mutton) or vegetable fat that were left to harden for several hours. In addition to smelling bad, the tallow candle produced only a tiny yellow flame and a lot of smoke.

As for beeswax candles, they were much more expensive and were mainly used by the nobility and the clergy. They provided better lighting, less smoke and did not give off any bad smells. Later, in the 19th century, tallow candles were replaced by stearin candles—the ones we know today.

Coloured candles and their significance

Depending on your ritual or prayer, choose the appropriate colour:

White: A symbol of purity, the white candle brings sincerity, truth and peace. This colour is used mainly for purification, as it represents spirituality. It can also replace all other colours.

Yellow: Yellow represents fortune and success. The yellow candle helps to increase self-confidence, intelligence and personal magnetism. It is generally used in care treatments.

Orange: Orange-coloured candles stimulate vital energy. They are used to relieve tension and be attractive to the world.

Pink: Pink represents platonic love, tenderness and affection. It is mainly used for everything related to sentimental stories and stable bonds.

Red: Symbol of passion and sexuality, red candles induce true love and awaken the dormant libido. They also allow women to reconnect with their sacred feminine power.

Violet: Symbol of protection and colour of independence, violet favours initiatives and is the typical colour of the psyche.

Blue: Blue candles promote creativity and protection against bad external influences.

Black: Black puts a brake on and neutralizes evil and bad energy. The black candle is often used as a shield against negative influences.

Gold: Often used at Christmas, golden candles have the power to attract good waves and positive cosmic influences! We take them out at Christmas time without even knowing about their benefits!

In short, candles are a good way to address your guardian angel or a departed loved one. They can be used to meditate or to make a special request. During a ritual or a prayer, it is important to let the candle burn until the end, whether you light a lantern or a standard candle. The next time you buy candles, think about their meaning, in addition to beautifying your home. If you would like to light a virtual candle in honour of a loved one, contact our sister division Complexe Aeterna and send them a photo of your loved one. Then they can invite family and friends to do the same.

The Colours of Mourning

Grief is an adaptive process that we all go through at one time or another to ease the pain of losing a loved one. Although scientists have defined phases or stages of grief, each individual experiences the grieving process differently. Crematorium Montreal takes a look at the colours of grief, their meaning and their history.

At a funeral, we wear black

For many centuries, it has been customary to wear dark clothing to a funeral. This western tradition, to indicate to those around us and to the local population that we are in mourning, dates back to the 15th century. We also find some traces of its history long before that in Ancient Rome, where magistrates mourned their predecessor when they took office. For many centuries, the culture of grieving required the widow to “remain in mourning” (a tradition with several rules to follow, including the wearing of black clothes) for 2 years.

A colour associated with death, black is also associated with the earth, the underground, darkness, or the devil and sin according to the Bible. Black represents the darkness, night sleep, the absence of sun under the earth, completely opposite to the light.

Mourning in the world

While the Western world has adopted black to represent mourning, many other countries have preferred to associate it with bright and cheerful colours. In India and Japan, it is customary to wear white for funerals, symbolizing the purity of the soul, light and eternal rest. In China, red is associated with mourning and sometimes even pink, which symbolizes a joyful celebration if the deceased was very old—a sign of a long life. For Iranians, blue is the dominant colour, synonymous with eternal peace. Purple in its full spectrum, from lavender to mauve, is the liturgical colour of the Mass of the Dead and it formed an integral part of the mourning tradition for men in the 15th century. Today, black, grey, white, navy blue, dark green and dark mauve are all colours that we frequently find at funerals.

Flowers, the opposite of clothes
Traditionally, white or mauve flowers are chosen to celebrate the departure of a loved one—the perfect colours for mourning. White is symbolic of spirituality, peace, consolation and the passage from night to light. In contrast to the white flower, the purple flower evokes sadness and melancholy. Soft and nostalgic, pastel-coloured flowers are also ideal for funerals, and are often chosen to express bonds of friendship.

In short, black is never a requirement for a burial or funeral. Even though it symbolizes a universal mark of respect, it is all the more important to respect the choices, customs and traditions of the deceased and the family. More and more people prefer to celebrate the death of their loved one in a different way, without following the traditions of their ancestors step by step.